A Quick Report on Uncle Eli Waterpipe

First let me say this ain't supposed to be funny. Dorothy has discouraged me from writing about it because she says there is no way people will not think I am making fun of her old uncle. But I only do most of what she wants, not everything.

Dorothy's Uncle Eli was not at the wedding. He was in Beaver Gorge Memorial Hospital with several broken bones, multiple cuts and contusions, and a concussion of the brain.

Last week Uncle Eli and his wife, Aunt Ethyl, visited his old family home in Beaver Grove. It was the first time Eli had been there in fifty years. As you might imagine it brought back many memories. One memory we wish it had not brought back was how when Eli was a boy he "rode" the laundry chute from the first floor to the basement. You guessed it, he had to take that trip one more time even at his advanced age. He fit pretty good and the ride down was smooth enough, but the final destination of the ride had changed. Considerably. Seems the last people who owned the property had installed washer and dryer on the first floor and had no need for the chute. They had stored old garden tools (rakes, shovels, a hand plow, etc.) at the place where the basket for dirty clothes used to sit. Poor Eli hit bottom real hard and was knocked out. Aunt Ethyl got excited when he didn't respond to her calls and found him bleeding and unconscious on the basement floor. She was so agitated she could not remember the number for 911 so she solicited the help of a neighbor and finally got an ambulance to pick up her husband and take him to the hospital.

If you are laughing or even smiling at this it's okay, Eli is going to be all right. In a year or so.

Tales of Harper, short stories and poems about the fictional town of Harper, Mississippi is available on Amazon Kindle

One Car, Two Drivers

We are home. I drove over half the distance home and Dorothy drove all the way. The time I was behind the wheel she was sitting beside me but she might as well be the on doing the driving.
"Aren't you too close to that truck?" "You are driving over the speed limit." "Are you weaving?" "You seem to be sleepy." "Do you want me to drive some more?" "Remember people your age have slower reflexes." "Don't miss your turn, it's coming up in twenty miles."

When Dorothy was behind the wheel I came real close to giving her a dose of her own medicine. But I realized it wouldn't be a good thing to do. She would learn nothing from it and I would be in the doghouse for doing it. Like I said we made it home safe and sound. Dorothy believes (she told me so) she should get credit for being so diligent and watching out for me. I agreed with her thinking all the time we made it home because I am a very tolerant and forgiving man.

I still love her though. A lot!

Tales of Harper, short stories and poems about the fictional town of Harper, Mississippi is available on Amazon Kindle 

Getting Ready To Go Home

We ain't even been to the wedding yet and I am already thinking about the drive home. Early tomorrow morning we will get up and leave. We plan to drive all the way back to Harper in one day. Dorothy is excited to get back and start moving her furniture back in place after getting the floors refinished. The only time I flew in an airplane was when Hollis talked me in to going to London with him and that girl. You can be sure that my next trip will be by air. I probably won't post anything tomorrow since we will spend the whole day driving.

It will be good to get back to our little lake.

Tales of Harper, short stories and poems about the fictional town of Harper, Mississippi is available on Amazon Kindle

Good People in This Country

Dorothy and I are in St. Louis. We did have a little adventure getting here. I drive an old Mercedes (1995.) I love it because it is comfortable on the road and gets real good milage. Dorothy has been after me to get a new car since before we were married. Her big objection to my old car is the fact there is only one cup holder between the seats. Well actually it's more than that but that's the one I hear most often. Her next suggestion was we drive to this wedding in her car, a much newer one. I wouldn't hear of it. She may have been right. We stopped over night because I was a little tired and my vision was getting blurry. This morning the car wouldn't start. It's a diesel and the glow plug light was not coming on. Luckily the place we stopped had a MB dealership. They didn't have the parts we needed but phoned ahead to St. Louis. The car ran just fine once it was started so we made it in plenty of time for the dealer to take a look at the problem. They sat us down, gave us coffee and drinks, and even brought in a plate of fried chicken and potatoes (they have a catered lunch for employees every Friday.) The car couldn't be fixed till the next morning (waiting for the part) so they gave us a loaner (no charge.) The people along the way couldn't have been nicer. I told Dorothy the only problem was they were so nice I would have to drive to St. Louis the next time I needed a new car. Don't worry. I ain't ready to give up on my old '95 just yet.

Tales of Harper, short stories and poems about the fictional town of Harper, Mississippi is available on Amazon Kindle

St. Louis Memories

We are off to St. Louis today for that wedding, one of Dorothy's nieces daughters and a boy from San Diego. Last night I saw the Cardinals win in a game against Pittsburg. The Cardinals have always been one of my favorite teams. As a boy I listened to their games on the radio and once my Uncle Bertram took me and a friend up to Missouri to watch a game in person. It was played at Sportsman Park (I think that was the name) and luckily Dizzy Dean was pitching. Unfortunately he was pitching for the Chicago Cubs. Since he was a big part of the Cardinals and their winning ways back in the thirties he was greeted with a mixture of cheers and jeers. I was only nine years old but I will never forget the thrill of seeing right in front of me the heros of my radio viewing. One of the things I hope to do, if we have time, is drive by the old spot where the stadium stood. Nostalgia, doncha know.

Tales of Harper, short stories and poems about the fictional town of Harper, Mississippi is available on Amazon Kindle

Another Wedding

We are packing for another wedding trip. This one is in St. Louis. This year we have been to weddings in Highlands, Charlotte, Ft. Worth and now to St. Louis. We have another in November in Watercolor, Fl. Packing is harder this time because we are working around the floor refinishers Dorothy has commissioned to do the downstairs at our house. Seems I always forget something when I go on one of these wedding trips. My wife is on it this year, she has made me a checklist and I am trying my best to follow it. I told her thank you and she said, "You're welcome, Harvey Lee, but I'll be honest I'm doing it more for me than for you." A couple of years ago I forgot my tux shirt and Dorothy had to go to the ceremony alone. She didn't know many people there and the trip home was a silent one. Maybe the list is more for me after all. Well, gotta get busy.

Tales of Harper, short stories and poems about the fictional town of Harper, Mississippi is available on Amazon Kindle

Paint Delay

Sorry to be so late posting today. Dorothy is having the house repainted, the inside that is. I could not get upstairs to my computer. I will have to admit it was a situation that could have been easily solved since my computer is a laptop and if I would have thought about it I could have brought it down stairs. I spent most of the day on the screen porch reading. It was pretty cool today and a fresh breeze blew in off the lake. Every now and then I caught the smell of late blooming flowers. It was so nice I literally forgot about my upstairs study and all the computer things I do up there. Tomorrow Dorothy has some men coming in to refinish the hardwood floors. I reckon I won't recognize the house I've lived in all these years when they get through. Oh, well.

Tales of Harper, short stories and poems about the fictional town of Harper, Mississippi is available on Amazon Kindle