How Harper Started to Change (from Oct. 2010)

I was out fishing today with Brother Harley Hardison, the new preacher at the Harper Baptist Church. Now, the one me and Bethel went to was the Harper Lake Baptist Church. They don't have anything to do with each other. Ever. Brother Harley has been after me to come to his church. I told him to stand in line cause they trying to get me to Harper Lake too.  And Father O'Doole is working real hard to get me to come back to his church and become a full fledged Catholic.

I was just thinking how peaceful it was out on the lake. Just me and the preacher and the blue sky and gentle breeze and, of course the hum of the power plant singing to us. It's peaceful, but not like it used to be. That murder we had back in 1946 sorta started things going down. Back then we might drink a beer now and then and even drink something out of a brown paper bag, but now I hear about some of our young people sticking needles in they arms and taking pills along with what they drink. Yeah, I think that murder was the beginning of it all.

Tomorrow: Sheriff's siren

Wilkie Strikes Back (from Oct. 2010)

The story didn't end with Wilkie getting well and all that. The next winter on a particularly cold night old Dr. Biltwright called Wilkie up. Now I don't know if I told y'all but Wilkie was real good at plumbing too. And Dr. Biltwright had a plumbing problem. They was out at his house on the river and it had only one bathroom and the water closet was real stopped up. They was out there because they had just had their house painted and Mrs. Dr. Biltwright couldn't abide the smell of the new paint. Well, Wilkie told him--don't y'all get ahead of me now--just to drops a couple of aspirin in it and call him in the morning if it wasn't unstopped by then. People tell me they read that same story in Reader's Digest. Well I did too. But I read it several years after it happened to Wilkie. I'll tell a little more about Wilkie and Betty Faye Whitmire tomorrow.

Doctor Talks to Wilkie (from Oct. 2010)

I could tell right off things wasn't any too good by the way that city doctor looked when he walked in. He looked like he had just sucked a dozen lemons. Betty Faye was sitting there knitting or something. The doctor walked over to Wilkie, who was gray as grandma's hair. The doctor took Wilkie's hand and looked into his yellow eyes. He said Mr. Whitmire do you want a preacher or a priest? Betty Faye commenced to crying. I mean bawling. Wilkie sat up in the bed. Hush up, Betty Faye, I'll handle this he said. Look here Doctor What-ever-your-name-is, I don't want no preacher and I don't want no priest. I don't want to go to heaven and I don't want to go to hell. I want to go back to Harper, Mississippi. The doctor turned to Betty Faye and said I think he's gonna be alright.

And he was. Wilkie is over at the filling station right now, healthy as ever. If you come to Harper you can see him and he'll tell you. But don't be planning to stay too long. Like I said before we got enough here as it is.

Now that ain't the end of the story. Tomorrow I'll tell about Wilkie and old Doctor Biltwright.

Wilkie Whitmire in the Hospital (from Oct 2010)

Today, I'll tell y'all about my cousin Wilkie Whitmire's stay in a big New Orleans hospital. It all began one night way back--I reckon around 1958 or 9. Wilkie got a real bad stomach ache and told his wife, Betty Faye Whitmire, that he thought he was going to die from the pain. She called old Doctor Biltwright--not the young one, the young one is a grindacologist. And as you know Wilkie didn't have none of the right parts to see him. Old Doctor Biltwright told Wilkie to take a couple of aspirins and call him in the morning. That wasn't good advice, 'cause the next morning Wilkie was on the early train to New Orleans and got checked in to this big hospital. They said he had a busted appendix. I looked it up in the library in a book with pictures and seen it was a little biddy thing hooked on to the bottom part of the entrails. They said it wasn't good for nothing but to catch watermelon seeds or fish bones--things that would just pass through anyway, don't you know. 

Well, I don't believe there is nothing that ain't got a purpose. Just look at this. If Wilkie wadn't in that hospital bed in New Orleans, he would have been back in Harper and could have got hit by a truck or struck by lightning if we had had a storm, which we didn't, but you know what I mean. I was sitting right there when this big city doctor come in. 

Tomorrow I'll tell you what he said about how bad Wilkie was.

Wilmer the Druggist (adapted from 10-11-10)

Way back in the Depression we had an outstanding citizen in Harper. His name was Wilmer Harris and he was our town druggist. Now this story happened toward the end of Wilmer's drug store days when he was about as frail as anybody you'd ever want to meet. He wore a sweater even on hot summer days and was a chain smoker. People said that his ashes, in the mixtures he made up, made them stronger and more able to cure you. Wilmer had a son, Wilmer Jr. But everybody around Harper just called him Harris. They pronounced it "Hairs." He was one fine baseball player, but he had to go off to war and as far as I know never played no more. But we'll have to save him for later. Now, we want to look at his daddy, Wilmer Sr.

 One story about Wilmer that comes to mind was when Eva Lou Wardlaw come by to see him about the kind of magazines in his store. She told him the Lord had come to her in a dream and had sent her to get him to stop keeping certain magazines. He asked her which ones and she said the crime ones and the love ones, mainly, but she warn't too sure about some of the others either. Now this is what I liked about Wilmer. He told Eva Lou that she was probably right, but he hadn't been blessed with no dream and would like for her to meet the magazine man at the store every Wednesday morning and she could pick out what books he should send back. Eva Lou left in a huff saying the Lord hadn't ask her to do that. She was only supposed to tell him to keep the right stuff on his shelves.

 I don't think Wilmer lived too long after that, but I'm glad he was around long enough to set Eva Lou right before she started messing around with my funny books. (Funny books is what we called comic books in those days.)

Catfish Caught (adapted from 10-10-10)

Like I said sometimes luck just comes knocking at your door or floating on the lake, as the case may be. Well that ole catfish pulled that boat and Millwood and grandpa right over to the shallow part of the lake and Millwood took the notion to jump on it and ride it down like a rodeo bull. And he did; and that fish commenced to bucking and rolling and dipping, but Millwood hung on somehow, so it's been told. Grandpa was having trouble keeping the boat afloat, but he managed to give one heck of a slam to the head of the catfish with one of the oars. We never knew if the fish just give out or the blow was in some real delicate area or whatever, but the fish rolled over on it's back and Millwood and grandpa towed it to the homeside of the lake and beached it. Word is it fed more'n half the town.

There was a writeup in the Harper Bee about the catching of the big catfish in which Millwood was asked if he had ever done any rodeo work. "Naw," he replied. "I just seen it in a John Wayne picture show down at the Palace Theater."

I don't think we got any catfish in the lake now and nobody ever knew where that one come from, because, to the best of anybody's knowledge, it was the one and only catfish ever caught in Harper Lake.

Hollis recommends: Harvey Lee has a cousin in Atlanta. He is in a creative writing class and two of his fellow writers have recently published books, as the sycamore grows by Jennie Miller Helderman and Redeeming the Wounded by B. Bruce Cook. It would be nice if you would find out more about these books
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and

Still More on Catfish (adapted from Oct. 2010)

Like I was saying Grandpa and Millwood was out here on Harper Lake all those years ago when Grandpa's hook was taken up by this enormous fish. 

Me and Father O'Doole was fishing in Harper Lake just this morning. We been friends since my second wife liked for me to take her to mass every Sunday. After she got hit by a  streetcar in New Orleans and died, I still went to mass right regular, but I never was a full-fledged Catholic.
I mean I never learned all the different names they had for things or went to confession--something you supposed to do often if you are Catholic. Two of my kids remained Catholic. I don't know about the other one, Bill, 'cause he don't communicate with none of us. 

I read somewhere that Mark Twain said something like: Man is the only animal with the true religion; several of 'em. Well, we got several of 'em right here in Harper. And they all filled with good people. 

I reckon I would have stayed with the Catholics myself if it wasn't for Trixie, my third wife. She got me going to all those revivals with her and after we was divorced somehow I never got back to regular church worship. But I really do enjoy the company of Father O'Doole.


But I gotta get back to grandpa and Millwood. They was chasing down a big ole fish when they seen it was a catfish. Every so often they would get close enough for Millwood to hit it on the head with an oar. But nothing seemed to slow it down any. 

This get me thinking about how much catfish is served up these days. Every cafe in Harper County has it on the menu. My favorite is at Dorothy's Cafe. If you was her you could smell what's coming out of Dorothy's right this minute. She is cooking country fried steak. I know it because it's Wednesday and she had country fried steak every Wednesday. Of course, you can always get catfish if that's what you want. 

I think I'll have to finish up tomorrow I'm getting to be a little bit hungry. Ain't nobody makes country fried steak like Dorothy.

More About the Catfish (from 10-8-10)

Everything was peaceful on the lake when grandpa felt a pull on his line. Well, it was more than a pull it was an outright yank. Grandpa grabbed hold of his pole with both hands and yelled out so loud he woke Millwood up. Millwood and his wife had moved to town about ten years before all this happened and that was alright back then. Harper needed the people. But now we got more'n 600 citizens and that's enough. The other day I was sitting whittling, minding my own business when this stranger come up and started asking questions about our town. He asked if I had lived here all my life. You know what I told him? I said, "Not yet." He thought that was kinda funny, but I wasn't trying to be funny. I just don't like it when people ask stupid questions. Then he asked me what people were like around here. I threw it right back at him. I asked what people were like where he lived. He told me they was awful and he was trying to get away from there. And I told him they were exactly the same here. He kinda huffed off, but I didn't care. Yeah, back when Millwood come over here that was alright. 

Oh yeah, Millwood and grandpa. They both knew there was a big, I mean real big, fish on the line. Grandpa yelled out, his pole was gonna break and that's when Millwood took things into his own hands.

Hollis: I'll try to get him to finish tomorrow. It's not as easy as you might think.

Catfish (cont.) - from Oct. 2010

Now the way it was told to me, Millwood was rowing and grandpa was getting all the lines and bait and stuff together. On the other side of the lake wasn't no houses or nothing, just trees. Now over there we got doctors and lawyers. One of them lawyers sued a big drug company and won about forty million dollars for himself. My cousin May Margaret was in on that deal and she told me all she got was a check for forty-two dollars. Anyway, they got to the middle of the lake and had to stop for a cool drink. They always drank a little beer when they was in the middle of the lake because both my grandmother and Millwood's wife was teetotalers. They attended different churches together but that didn't matter 'cause they all was against drinking. I used to take a drink now and then, but now I don't. You see it's my idea of the right thing. I ain't got no woman riding me about it. Now let's see where was I. Oh, yeah. Grandfather and Millwood got to the spot they was looking for and put they lines out and was both just sitting there riding out the blessings of the day and that's when all heck broke loose. I hear Willie coming up the drive, so I gotta run. More tomorrow.

Grandfather and the Forty Pound Catfish (from Oct 2010)

It was years ago when my grandfather caught a big fish right here in Harper Lake.  Grandpa and his friend Millwood Tucker was up early that morning and went down to the lake which was right behind grandpa's house. He built that house back in eighteen hundred something when he come here from up north. He took a job with the Illinois Central Railroad as a call boy. A call boy, who was usually a boy, would get on his bicycle and ride over to an engineer's house when he was due to go out on a run. There wasn't a lot of telephones back then, doncha know. Grandpa went on to be what they call a fireman, who shoveled coal into the furnace to run a train. Eventually, he became an engineer, who is the fellow who drives the train. Yep, grandpa started out as a call boy.

Millwood and was down at the lake getting their boat ready to go out and catch some supper. Millwood. Millwood Tucker. He was from over around Natchez on the Mississippi River somewheres, so you can just guess he was expert at all kinds of fishing. And he and my grandpa took that boat right out in the middle of the water. Now, the town of Harper runs all around the lake now, but back then there wasn't too many people living in Harper. But most was real characters. We still got a bunch of characters in Harper. But not as many as they got in that town in the next county. The one that used to have a railroad shops. Once I heard a fellow say that all that town needed to qualify as an asylum was to have a ten foot wall built around it. I disagree. I think the wall should be at least twenty feet.

Tomorrow, I'll try to get back to that catfish.

Hollis Speaks (from Oct. 2010)

My name is Hollis Ludlowe. I am Uncle Harvey Lee’s great nephew and I am the one who got him interested in a daily blog. Uncle Harvey Lee has completed his first month of blogging. He is giddy over the number of visitors to his site and has asked me to ask those on FaceBook to look for his page. You can find it by searching for Harvey Lee Whitmire. He would love to have you as a friend. Also he asked me to prompt you to recommend his posts to any of your friends who may want to keep up with things going on in our little town

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Uncle Harvey Lee is well-known throughout Harper County for his stories. Over the past week, he has been retelling to me the story of his grandfather and the forty pound catfish he caught many years ago. I encouraged him to post this on the blog. I must warn you that Uncle Harvey Lee has the kind of memory that is too good. When he comes across a name, place, or event in the telling of his story, he will stop and tell all about it. Consequently, it takes him a while to tell a fairly simple story. Tomorrow you will see what I mean.

Phone Calls from Trixie (from 10-4-10)

Well like I said wasn't no more than a year 'fore Trixie started calling me. She said she made a mistake and wanted to come back to Harper. I told her it wasn't a good idea 'cause even if I could dig way down deep in my heart and forgive her, the folks of Harper ain't gonna be that easy. She kept calling for many months and then she quit. Ain't heard from her since.

Now when I look back on it, my religion was always taken from what my wives did. Like with Bethel I was a real good Baptist and with Mary Kate I was a right regular Catholic and with Trixie I went to all them tent meetings and revivals. Now I'm just a plain Christian. It makes me sad to go into a church. I'm working on it and one day I expect I'll end up back at the Harper Baptist Church, but now I spend a lot of time sitting by the lake. I read Bible verses there and sing hymns kinda low like. There ain't no place to find  the glory of the Lord like sitting by Harper Lake with a soft breeze wiping across your face, soaking up the sun or appreciating the rain accompanied by the soft hum of the power plant.

My Life Without Trixie (from 10-3-10)

I don't know if y'all ever felt like this, but I just couldn't decide if I missed Trixie or not. Most of me was kinda happy she wasn't around no more, but a little piece of me missed her. Missed her pretty eyes and her pretty hair. She had this big mole on her nose, but you kinda got used to that. Well now that mole was wandering all over Texas with that tent preacher. I made myself think about all the things about Trixie that just got under my skin. Things I never would have considered when she was with me. Like how she wasn't even really named Trixie. She was really Norma Faye. Guess I shouldn't make too much of her name change since I was really named Lee Harvey Whitmire. But after November 1963 I changed that. Trixie didn't really have blonde hair, just bottles of stuff to turn it.  And she was always needing new clothes. Well since she rededicated her life to that tent preacher, he would have to use some of his collections on her.  She hadn't been gone more'n a year or so when she started calling me telling me how she had made a mistake and wanted to come back. Tomorrow I'll tell you what I told her.

What Trixie Had to Say (from 10-2-14)

I can't say I didn't expect something was going on between Trixie and that tent preacher. She kept getting us to move closer down front and didn't pay no attention to me when I asked her if she was comfortable and all. Then on the second night he was preaching she went down and rededicated her life to the service of the Lord. And she did that every night he was here. On the last night, after the service, she come to me all teary eyed and told me she was leaving with that preacher. She told me how wonderful I was and how lucky she was to live with me the last few years.

But she said she needed to expand her life and that didn't include living in Harper. She said she would always love me in her special way. She saw how hard it hit me and offered to give me comfort in the bedroom one last time. And I said no. Puts me in mind of ole Mitchell Wardlaw, who when offered a drink would say he didn't mind if he would take that drink. He said he had turned down one once and was sorry ever since. Well I don't know if I have been sorry or not because that wasn't the last I seen of Trixie.

The Tent Revival Preacher (from Sept 2010)

We got this ole fish hawk, some people call him a osprey, out on the lake. He sits high in this pecan tree on the banks of Harper Lake and every now and then he gets hungry and goes circling high above the water until he sets his eye on his dinner. Then he dives straight down, as straight as the part in Bobby Jones' hair, and hits the water with a slap like somebody swung down with a 1 by 6 board. He seems to always come up with a good size fish and flies to the same limb each time--not the one where he sits all day--and eats up that fish.

Now, the sound he makes when he hits the water is like the slap to my soul when this tent revival preacher come to town and tore my heart to pieces.

This preacher, Rev. Jerry Truman, stayed for about a week, took up a slew of collections, and had a bunch of the women in town slobbering all over themselves. He warn't all that good looking but he had a kind of draw, don't you know. Even the men dropped all the money they could spare in his plates. At the end of the week he took down his tent, packed up his stuff and left town and Trixie left with him. Tomorrow I'm gonna tell you what Trixie said to me before she left.

My First Year with Trixie (from 9-28-10)

I'm gonna tell you right off the bat, Trixie, my third wife, was full of fun. She got me doing all kinda of things I never woulda believed I'd do. Like square dancing; we went to the Dance Barn every Wednesday night. That's when Bethel and me would have been in Prayer Meeting. And Trixie taught me how to do the Cha Cha Cha and the Twist and all kinda of fast dancing. I got pretty good because I had so much practice. The best thing Trixie did for me was take my mind off losing two wives. Especially Bethel. 

Trixie liked a lot of attention. She always slept right up against me and was always running her hand through my hair. She didn't cook none, but I could take care of breakfast and dinner. Trixie worked all day at the Glamor Shoppe selling dresses and shoes and women's stuff. We ate almost every supper at Dorothy's Cafe.

Trixie wasn't no special religion, but she loved to go to any revival at any church. She'd get in the spirit and would leave plumb wore out. But she always seemed to revive herself any time she got in the bed.

My life with Trixie was real good, but little did I know the balloon was about to pop and send me crashing back against the wall.

Meeting Trixie (from 9-27-10)

A cold front come through Harper County last night and it didn't get no higher than the low eighties today. We're all real glad. It's been one of the hottest summers we ever saw. Down at the cafe this morning, I heard a fellow say it was that global warning thing. He said he never knew who was giving the warning. Warning or not it was hot.

But the cool nights fit right in with me telling you about me meeting Trixie, who turned out to be my third and last wife. That night was the first cool night that year too.
I don't think I told y'all but my business was as a welder. My granddaddy started a blacksmith shop years ago which turned into a welding business with my daddy. I did all kinds of welding jobs, but for fun I did welding art. Still do. And at the county fair I took some of my stuff for sale and display. That's when I first saw Trixie. She was from the next county down and had not been to Harper a lot. I'll have to say she was a knockout. I had done a little metal monkey that could be hung from a tree. And Trixie was real took in by it. She said, "Who did this thing?"  And I said "I did."  And from then on we was locked in love.

Looking Back on Bethel and Mary Kate

 When I look back on my first two wives, I can't help but see how different they each was.

Bethel was trim and real pretty. She put up with a whole bunch from me with my drinking and running around and all. She will always be my one true love. I can never get back all the time I wasted out drinking when I could have been right there with her.

Mary Kate was at best pleasingly plump. She dyed her hair jet black and had a slight bitter odor about her. She was a good wife and was good to Bethel's children. Mary Kate wasn't near as forgiving as Bethel, but maybe she was what me and the kids needed at the time. We was all regular at the Catholic Church because of her.

I don’t know if I mentioned to y’all that I like opera. Most people find that strange, me coming from a small Mississippi town. It was my daddy what got me interested. He had spent a year living with an Italian family in New Orleans and learned to love Puccini and Verdi down there. Anyway, why I’m telling you this is there is a song in Tosca where this artist fellow is painting a religious picture what has a blonde beauty in it and he sings out about what he calls the hidden harmony between his woman in the painting and his real woman, the dark skinned, dark haired Tosca.That's what I think about when I compare my first two wives. 

All in all I was lucky with both wives. But not so with my third wife,Trixie. She was a different matter altogether. I met Trixie at a county fair and for the next few years she led me down paths I never thought I would go down.

Mary Kate (from 9-23-10)

Well, one of the best things about living in Harper is you know everybody. And one of the worst things is you know too much about everybody. Like one night Bethel got up from the table to answer the phone. Doreen was spending the night with a friend and me and Bethel and Bill and Jack was sitting there. On the phone was Mrs. Nicholson who lived just up the hill from us. She asked Bethel if we was all okay. Bethel said yes we were and why did she ask. And old lady Nicholson said she was worried when she saw there was only four of us at the supper table. I reckon the old woman was just plain lonely to be looking so much into other peoples lives. 

And that kind of thing is what made me notice Mary Kate. She had lived in Harper all her life and I didn't know nothing about her. After Bethel died I spent two lonely years and I reckon that made me see things I didn't see when I was happy with my Bethel.

I was trying to be a good father, but them kids was about all I could handle. Mary Kate was the head of the cafeteria at Doreen's school. I kept coming by to check on Doreen, but really to get in good with Mary Kate. Before you knew it we was regular courting. Everything looked real good for us. Except for one thing. Mary Kate was a Catholic.

Rethinking Sobriety (from 9-23-10)

I got to be honest. I been thinking and I ain't so sure that one dream had a lot to do with me quitting drinking. I think it was more of Bethel praying for me. During that time me and Bethel had two more children. I was still hanging out with my drinking buddies till late at night, but I had quit my woman hunting. When I would come in and try to be friendly with Bethel, she was usually friendly back. God bless her. But night after night when I turned and started to try to go to sleep I could feel the bed shaking away. I thought she was crying and after a few nights I said, "What's wrong with you? What are you crying for?" And Bethel said she wasn't crying, she was praying. I'm telling you it was like lying in one of them beds you put a quarter in and ride out five or ten minutes of them magical fingers. And I figured if she was praying that hard for me I had to do something about it. And that's when I quit.

We had a real good life with me acting right, but it wasn't long until Bethel got real sick and in less than a year died. And I just have to live with all that.

Drinking and Stuff (from 9-22-14)

Like I said I was feeling sorry for myself after my hospital stay. And when I come home my feet was all purple and I had a hard time getting around. Bethel was like an angel and looked after me. But I guess it wasn't enough for me and I started to going down to the Do Drop Inn and having a drink or two with the fellows. And before you knew it I was a full-fledged drunk, coming home and cussing out Bethel and scaring the baby. Then I started doing things with a woman who hung around the bar that I don't even want to talk about it.

 Brother Emil Stoozer, the new preacher at the church came walking right into the bar one night and embarrassed me so bad I come out with him. He talked real rough with me and told me how selfish I was. I didn't work too good. I kept drinking, but bought me a bunch of brown paper bags to try to hide my sin. But I did give up what I was doing with that woman.

You know what made me quit all that stuff. A dream. One night I woke out of deep drunk-sleep and knew I had had a bad dream. I  couldn't remember all what happened but I knew I wasn't any too good. Over the next few days I began to remember things about the dream and what I remember most was I was in hell and it was hot as where I was in that dream. When I asked the devil for some water, he said all they had was bourbon and he made me drink it. And the more I drank the thirstier I got and the hotter I got. After I remember all that dream stuff I didn't have no desire to drink no more. And I ain't had a real drink since. Now that's the truth.

Korea and What it Done to Me (from 9-22-10)

Sometime in 1951 the North Koreans marched down into South Korea. This wasn't good.  Right after Christmas in I found myself called up and had to leave Bethel. We'd been married only a little while and was living in bliss. I reckon her and me made Bill just before I left because he was born about nine months later. When I left on a train to New Orleans, I could look out the window and see Bethel standing right in front of the depot. She wasn't waving, but she smiled a big smile to let me know everything was gonna be okay. Of course I had no idea little Bill was growing inside her.
Well I come home in January of '53. War wounds. Wasn't no bullets or nothing. My feet got frostbit and I was sent to a hospital in California to get over it. I was let out in March and come home to Harper and I ain't left since. Except necessary trips to close by cities to get a decent hearing aid or things we ain't got here in Harper. Well, all that stuff with my feet, I guess, made me feel sorry for myself and I took to drinkin' and other bad stuff.

 Tomorrow I'll tell you about my dark days of drinking and how it hurt my Bethel so much.

Doreen (from 9-21-10)

My girl's name is Doreen. She was born in 1956. Now she lives over in Golds Creek. I think she may be separated from her no-good husband cause he ain't come over last few times she visited. She don't come but once or twice a year. Her kids used to drive me nuts, but now they're all growed up with kids of they own. One funny thing about Doreen (well, it ain't really funny) she's got this real ugly tattoo on her left fore arm and top of her hand that says: FALSTAFF BEER. Now you won't believe it, but she actually made a pretty good bit of money with that tattoo. Some local beer distributor paid her every month for flashing his beer at everybody she come up to. Well, that beer ain't around no more, but the tattoo is strong as ever. I hate to see it, but I reckon since she don't come around much it's okay. There's a town right in the next county that has a Falstaff sign on one of its buildings. It's been there since I was a boy. I guess they're like Doreen, advertising for nothing. Of course, a good coat of paint could fix theirs, but Doreen is stuck with hers. Tomorrow I'm gonna tell you about Korea and my war wounds.

Jack (from 9-20-10)

Me and Willie went out early to fish a while. We caught six bass and two white perch. I'm taking them to Dorothy and she'll get them cleaned and fix them for supper.

But today, I promised to tell y'all about my middle child Jack. His name is John Conroy, but we called him Jack. Now, Jack was cursed with real good looks. I mean girls were always calling our house and walking out of their way to come by to see if he was out in the yard. And this, in my opinion, caused Jack to take the wrong path in life. He didn't study like Bill so he was always close to getting booted from school. When Bethel was alive (she died when he was seven and one-half), she kept him in line. She didn't have to get tough with him because he loved her mor'n anything and tried hard to please her. But after she was gone he got into real trouble. In his junior year in high school he got two girls in trouble. I mean within a month of each other. Well there couldn't be no shotgun wedding there, could there? Bethel had a brother up in North Mississippi, a preacher, so we sent Jack up there. He only came home a couple of times for a day or two at a time after that. But he did settle down enough to got to college to make an engineer. At the time I was real confused why you had to go to college for four years in order to drive a train. Of course later I understood what an electrical engineer did. I hope you understand the difference in ignorance and stupidity.

And I hope you understand which one I was.

Bill (from 9-20-10)

Well, like I said me and Bethel had three children together. The first was Bill. His real name is William Clay  but we called him Bill. He was born while I was in Korea. Me and Bethel hadn't been married but a few months when I got the call. I reckon we made Bill just before I shipped out cause I wadn't over yonder but nine months when I got word he arrived. So when I come home there he was. He was a smart little thing, took after his mamma I reckon. He made real good grades and even traveled with the school to debate other schools. But his mamma never knew it. She died when he was only nine. She missed seeing him go off to college and make a lawyer. But at least she didn't have to suffer through missing him when he moved out to Hollywood, California and took up a life of high living. She didn't have to know he would forget about us and all he left behind in Harper. Of course, me and Bethel had two more children before she passed on, Jack and Doreen.
Tomorrow I'll try and explain Jack to you.

Jimbo's Hardward (from 9-18-10)

Hope I'll be able to talk more about me and Bethel tomorrow, but before I go on with that, I thought of a couple of stories about Jimbo Johnston and his hardware store. 

The first one took place back in the seventies. I know because it involved our town marshall, Bledsoe Blevins, and he died back in 1979. Well, Bledsoe was walking around about midnight one night, checking doors and found that Jimbo had forgot to lock his front door. He called him and told him to get down with his key. But Jimbo said it wadn't necessary; he was there all day and nobody came by, so he didn't think anybody would show up at midnight. 

Another time Jimbo was telling about how somebody came in and bought a broom. He forgot to charge it and couldn't remember who bought it. So he just charged everybody he could think of for a broom. I think it was $2.99. I asked him didn't people complain. Well he said Ethylene Walker raised a little hell so he bought her a coke and she cooled down. And he said the rest of the fools paid for the broom. Just like they really bought it, don't you know.

More About Harper (from 9-17-10)

Well Harper, like I told you, has 900 citizens, maybe a few more. We have everything here we need. There is no need to drive eight miles to that city with all the stores and the big mall. We got a real good grocery store, Neighborhood Pantry. We have Jimbo's hardware where you can get anything from hand plows to paint. There is Jay's Drug Store, Bickerstaff Furniture Store, and Speedy Dry Cleaning. And two of my favorite places: Berber's, a filling station, and Dorothy's Cafe. I don't drive much no more so the filling station is just a place where I get information and go to visit my cousin Wilkie. He has worked there for many years. He calls it his day job because he does lots of other things in his time off. And Dorothy, a very close friend of mine, runs one of the best eating places you'd every want to see. I eat lunch there every day that I'm not out in my boat. Today she has fried catfish. She has fish every Friday, but she ain't Catholic or nothing. I used to be for a while and she started serving fish for me and my second wife Mary Kate. That's just how good Dorothy is.

Me and Bethel (from 9-15-10)

Well like I said me and Bethel had three kids together, a girl (Doreen) and two boys (Bill and Jack.)

Doreen married a nair-do-well and lives over at Golds Creek. Bill and Jack both live out west. Doreen comes home once or twice a year even though it's only fifty miles to where she lives. And the boys ain't been home in several years. But I reckon that's all right.

Now I don't wish for much but if I could have one wish it would be to be standing right beside my Bethel, holding the hymn book, singing Blessed Assurance, in the Harper Lake Baptist Church. That's all I want to say today.

Bethel (from 9-14-10)

Like I told you my first wife was named Bethel. She was as sweet and as kind as a wife could be. I like to tell a story about how me and Bethel met that always miffed her up some. The story I told was this: we was both swimming at the Harper Lake Beach. I was changing from my wet bathing suit when I heard somebody come into the girl's side. Now the girl's side and the boy's side was separated by a piece of wall that did not go all the way to the ceiling or the floor. I bent over to look into the girl's side and me and Bethel rubbed noses. 

As you can figure this story wasn't true. We really knowed one another since we was in grade school, but I liked to fun around with Bethel. She was smarter than me, but who wadn't back then. I got most of my learning after I quit school, half way through the seventh grade. I saw better opportunity at the Neighbor Pantry, our grocery store, as a bag packer and delivery boy.

But this is about Bethel. We got married at the Harper Lake Baptist Church by Brother Ezra Crowder and was happy for more than ten years before Bethel got sick.

Tomorrow I'll talk about how Bethel and me had three children.