The Train (from Jan 2011)

Well, Hollis won. I'm going to Atlanta. There are things I want to see there and in Georgia, but I'm a little bid worried about leaving Harper. I ain't left in years. Dorothy come over to the big house early this morning. Willie was already there with his pickup truck. Dorothy told me to be careful and gave me a little peck on my cheek. I couldn't believe it. We ain't hardly touched one another in all the years we been friends.

Willie and me talked all the way to Hattiesburg where the train was gonna stop. Willie had been to Atlanta a bunch of times and told me all he knew about it. Most of it was real scary--roads with cars stop and go for mile after mile. That gave me something to think about on my train ride. We got to Hattiesburg, rode past the university and through the downtown till be come to the depot. We had a few minutes before the train got there. When the train did pull in, a man who worked there looked at my ticket and told me to walk about fifty feet down and wait there. Hollis had fixed it up so I had a little room of my own. Willie walked with me and helped me load my suitcase on the train. A real nice porter took me to my room and put my suitcase in a special place. He told me as soon as the train was moving he would be back to tell me how everything worked. I wasn't in my room more'n a couple minutes till the train started moving. I looked out the window and seen Willie waving to me. What come in my mind was would I ever see him again.

Tomorrow: Train Ride

Where the Queen Lives (from Jan 2011)

I ain't going, but if I did I wouldn't get in none of them cars with the steering wheel on the wrong side. I mean come on now. But here's the good news. According to some of them leaflets Hollis brung over to me you don't really have to have a car. They got trains going everywhere and in London they got what they call the tube. It's a underground railroad that will take you close to anyplace you want to go. They got this little map with a different color for each line. They got a bunch of lines. I kinda memorized which lines go to the places a fellow would want to go. You can go to all kinds of places. You can even go right up outside the house where the queen lives. They call it a palace, Buckingham Palace. If I went I would want to go there. But I ain't going.

Here's something else. The queen has a bunch of houses. One of the main ones she goes to is in Scotland. I guess she's a little like me. Sometimes I stay in the big house and sometimes I stay down in my fishing cabin. They said the queen's daddy, the former king stuttered just like Mel Tellis. Can't you see how much like Americans they is. But I ain't going.

Tomorrow: Learning More About England

Learning About England (from Jan 2011)

Like I told y'all I went through the 7 and 1/2 grade in school. And I also told y'all to recognize the difference in being ignorant and being stupid. I ain't learned all I need to learn, but I think I got a lot of common sense. Right now I do need to learn a lot about England.

One thing I figured out right off the bat was what this joke I heard meant just from reading them leaflets. The joke was why did the Siamese twins go to England? The answer: So the other one could drive. You see I was ignorant of the idea that those people over there drive on the wrong side of the road. It sure wasn't stupid not to know this. Who in his right mind would have guessed such a thing? So I am ahead of the game by reading them leaflets and books what Hollis brung to me. I figure I can learn enough right here in Harper; so I won't need to go all the way over there. Hollis says it ain't the same. Going is so much better. Well, I just as soon to have read about how cold it was in Korea and stayed at home by the fire. Something else I learned: Big Ben ain't no clock. It's a bell. You see what I mean. It wasn't stupid not to know that. Just a little ignorance.

Tomorrow: Where the Queen Lives (hint, a bunch of places)

Hollis Makes an Offer (from 2011)

Hollis sprung one on me. He wants to go to London to visit his girlfriend next month. And he wants me to go with him. I told him I ain't never been out of Harper that much and I didn't think so. He said I had been all the way to Korea and London wasn't that far. I told him I hope it wasn't nothing like the time I spent in Korea. Man. I don't reckon there's anyway he can talk me in to getting on a airplane and flying across the ocean just to listen to people talk like they done in that movie Tom Jones. He brung a bunch of books and leaflets for me to look over. And besides, I told him, it was winter and wasn't no time to go gallivanting around the world. I promised him I would look things over. But I ain't going.

Tomorrow: Learning About England

Settling Down in the Big House (from Dec 2010)

I reckon y'all gonna think I'm getting soft and y'all probably right. Living in my fishing cabin was good for me, but it sure is more comfortable here in the big house. This is where I was born and lived while I was married to Bethel, Mary Ann, and Trixie. It wasn't till after Trixie run off with that tent preacher that I moved down to the end of the lake. I was happy there, but Dorothy, my friend that's a girl, said she thought I ought to stay here for the time being. Her cafe ain't more'n a couple of blocks away and she can look after me better. 

She has one of her part-time women come by every day and clean and stuff and if I don't make it down to the cafe,  Dorothy brings my food by. The woman who comes by is Florene Getz. She has a sick husband at home and the money I pay her comes in right handy to her situation. She always lights a fire in any room where I might go and I just snuff 'em out when I go to bed. Yeah, living in the big house ain't too bad.

 Besides Hollis' family lives next door, about half a mile away, so he can drop by when ever he want's to. His girl friend is going to London for study and he ain't too happy about it. I think it might be good for them two to have a few miles between them. Kinda cool things down, doncha know. 

Tomorrow: Hollis Makes an Offer

A Funny Thing That Happened in Harper (from Dec 2010)

I wanted to tell y'all about something that happened down at the Social Needs Office which is three doors down from the hardware store. Mildred Swarms is the lady down there who says who gets help and who don't. Her and Frances McGruder, a good Baptist, was discussing the Christmas gift collection for the needy. Mildred is a Methodist. 

About that time this woman from out in the country come in. She had a stomach that stuck out like a big knot on a little log. I don't know the woman's name, the one that was with child, but Frances told me all about it. Well, this mother-to-be was looking for money to help to get her through her expecting time. Mildred, trying to find out if she could get help from other sources, asked her who the father was. And the expectant mother said, "It ain't got no father". Well, Frances said Mildred jumped up, knocked her chair over, and pushed pass them on her way to the front window. The young woman asked what was wrong and Mildred said she was just looking for the star, and the shepherd, and the wise men. She said she was particularly excited because this was the second time this had happened. You can't push too much past Mildred.

Tomorrow: More Goings-on Around Harper

Jack and His Family Leave (from Nov 2014)

Jack and Lou Ann and their grandchildren, Benjamin and Franklin, piled into the rented car with the Louisiana license plate and headed for New Orleans to catch their plane to San Francisco, California. It stopped raining and was warmer so they had the top down. As they was leaving Lou Ann gave me a big hug and told me how happy she was that they came. The boys did the same and lo and behold so did Jack.
He said we'll see you soon, Pop, (that's what they all call me.)

So they drove off and left me and Doreen standing there. Hollis was at school so it was just me and my pretty daughter standing there waving them off. I have to admit my prayers has been two-thirds answered.

Now if I can just come up with some way to get Bill back on board. I always figured he would be the easiest to get back, but I had no idea what a creep he has become. Now I want y'all to know I know some real good lawyers. Some of the best people I know. But Willie's boy Charles and my boy Bill ain't in there amongst "em.

Me and Lou Ann Have a Chat (from Nov 2010)

Me and Lou Ann talked but not in the boat; she ain't too good with water. We was sitting on the porch of the big house on the lake side. There is a little pond to the right and a bigger one to the left. The porch runs all the way around the house, but the lake-side is fixed up with a swing and rocking chairs. We was rocking away and talking a bunch. She told me what a good husband Jack had been. He was kind and considerate and was always telling her how much he loved her. Now, I never would have guessed it. She said she had for years tried to get him to call me or to come for a visit, but he was too ashamed for how he lived when he was young. 

I asked her if she thought he was afraid if he didn't hurry up and come over I might be dead before he did come. And she said she didn't want to say it, but she was sure that was a big reason. Lou Ann told me all their children was good and working hard to raise their families. She showed me pictures and I swear there's something real pretty about that Chinese/English/German/French mixture. They was all beautiful. I hope one day they will all come to Harper to see me.

Tomorrow: Jack and His Family Leave

The New Doreen (from Nov 2010)

After Jack went off in that car he rented to visit his long lost kids, Doreen wanted me to take her out in the boat; just the two of us. I figured she wanted to talk and I figured right. When we got out to the middle she started off just like Jack, spouting all kind of stuff. She was sorry she hadn't treated me good all these years. She was sorry she had married those two no-good fellows, the gambler and the drunkard. She said she knew they was rotten but figured she could change them. Seems like I heard that story before. 

She had a new job and was making good helping to manage this gravel company where she lives. And she, I'll have to say, was as pretty as she used to be. She got rid of that black nail polish and that dark, dark lipstick. And her hair was all one color. Her dress was real pretty and not hippy-like which was what she wore before. And she was using good English. Better'n me of course, but I ain't got no reason to and she does. She is going to a Methodist Church right regular and sings in the choir. I reckon that's alright, but ever time I been to the Methodists all their songs sounded just alike to me. 

So as we was rowing in Doreen promised me she was going to do better and I believed her.

Tomorrow: Me and Lou Ann Have a Chat